Ugly Dog Names: Funny, Crazy, But Still Cute

ugly dog
Emily Young
Written by Emily Young

We all know it’s important to stay unique in today’s world. Our planet is so full of people, it’s no wonder there are those that want to be noticed and stand out. The same is true with our dogs. There are simply too many Roxies, Maxes, and Spots around. How do you make your dog stand out from the pack? By giving him ugly dog names of course.

Many people cringe at the thought of giving their dog an ugly name because it might offend other people. Some owners also don’t want to sound silly especially in public. But ugly dog names don’t need to be offensive or hurtful. Ugly dog names can be cute and endearing too.

If you want to give your pupper a unique name, you might want to consider an ugly name. You will earn a lot of stares, and there will be a lot of questions, but if it amuses you, then it should be enough.

If you’re worried about ugly dog names, you don’t have to be because we have some suggestions you can try. In this article, we will tackle ugly dog names so that you can find a crazy, funny, or cute name to call your pooch.

Names Based on Your Dog’s Attributes

crazy dog

Many dogs look the same, but they all have different characteristics and behavior. When you want to give an ugly name to your dog, check out their attributes first. Take time to observe your dog. Are they wacky? Do they poo anywhere? Or do they have some disturbing habits that tick you off?

Here are some good examples:

  • Bonkers – dogs that go into panic mode.
  • Chomper Face – dogs that eat too fast or too much.
  • Clingy Nut Ball – dogs that don’t want you to go anywhere.
  • Crash Bang Pop – the sounds he makes when he thrashes around your house.
  • Farter Pooch – another name that’s straightforward.
  • Foul Dog – for his bad breath or stinky smell.
  • Grimace – his idea of a smile.
  • Loco – Spanish for crazy.
  • Poop Snacker – puppers that eat poop.
  • Rancid – sounds and smells ugly.
  • Stinky Poop Pup – does not need an explanation.

See Also: Why Do Dogs Eat Poop

Names with Secretly Terrible Meanings

There are also “normal” sounding names that actually have terrible meanings. This is a good choice for people who have a wacky sense of humor but don’t want to offend or hurt other people. You might need to explain your choices to people who know a little bit about the name, but for the most part, you’re probably safe.

These names aren’t ugly per se, but they do have a darker and more sinister meaning.

#1: Girl Names

ugly dog with her tongue out

  • Akuji – this means “dead and wake in African.” Not very cheery but still a unique name especially stateside.
  • Cecilia – this name sounds pretty and melodic, but it actually means “blind.”
  • Claudia – another classic name ideal for girl dogs but not so perfect because it actually means “lame or disabled.”
  • Deirdre – means “sad or sorrowful” in Celtic and Gaelic.
  • Dolores – literally means “lady of sorrow” in Spanish.
  • Emily – this name is one of the most popular names out there, but it also means “rival.”
  • Hecate – after the Greed Goddess of witchcraft.
  • Jezebel – sounds sexy and conventional but actually means “a follower of false gods” in Hebrew.
  • Kennedy – from the Gaelic and Celtic combination which means “deformed head.”
  • Keres – is a Greek name that means “evil spirits.”
  • Leah – another normal and innocent sounding name but means “tired or weary” in Hebrew.
  • Lilith – means “night monster or ghost.”
  • Lola – the diminutive form of Dolores (see above).
  • Mallory – “ill-fated or unfortunate” in French.
  • Malvolia – this is the feminine version of Shakespeare’s Malvolio which means “ill will’.
  • Mara – “bitter and sorrowful” in Hebrew.
  • Mary – Jesus’s mother’s name should mean pure and innocent, but it’s far from that because in Hebrew it means “bitter” or “rebellion.”
  • Molly – we don’t know why the Hebrew has lots of names that mean “bitter.”
  • Narcissa – this name is for the narcissus flower—also known as the daffodil—but these yellow flowers mean “self-obsession.”
  • Nerezza – “darkness” in Italian.
  • Persephone – alludes to the Greek Goddess of Spring but also means “to destroy” or “murder’. Just tell people that your dog is named after the goddess.
  • Portia – derived from “pig.”
  • Rebecca – is a well-known biblical character. The name means “to bind, tie, or snare.”
  • Sidero – sinister sounding and means “evil nymph.” Very apt.
  • Sloane – means “warrior or fighter” in Gaelic, so not bad.
  • Thana – means “death” in Arabic.
  • Tristana – “sorrowful or sad” in Celtic.
  • Tristesse — “sadness” in French.
  • Zilla – we wish this was short for Godzilla because that would be cool. Sadly, it means “shadow,” “shade,” and “gloom” in Hebrew. Still not bad though.

#2: Boy Names

ugly black and white dog

  • Abaddon – “Angle of Death” in Hebrew.
  • Alastor – people who grew up with the Harry Potter books know that this is the name of Mad-Eye Moody, but it also means “prosecutor” or “tormentor” in Greek.
  • Azazel – another cool name because it’s one of the characters in the X-Men comic books especially because he is a villain. In the Bible, the name is cited as an “evil demon,” “evil spirit,” or “fallen angel.” Sinister and cool though.
  • Brennan – is a popular boy name and means “sorrow” or “sadness” in Gaelic.
  • Brone – Irish for “sadness.”
  • Byron – old English for “cowshed.”
  • Calvin – from the French word chauve which means “bald.”
  • Cameron – “crooked nose” in Scottish.
  • Campbell – another Scottish term meaning “crooked mouth.”
  • Cessair – “sorrow or affliction.”
  • Das – from the Sanskrit word dasa, meaning “servant or slave.”
  • Doyle – “dark stranger” in Irish.
  • Dracul – this name sounds cool and alludes to Dracula. It means “devil or dragon,” making it even cooler.
  • Dugal – same meaning as Doyle.
  • Huxley – innocent sounding but means “inhospitable place.”
  • Jabez – a biblical name in the Old Testament which means “he makes sorrowful” in Hebrew.
  • Jacob – means “supplanter.” But this Biblical character actually helped found the 12 Tribes of Israel.
  • James – derived from Jacob.
  • Jolon – the Native Americans translate this name to “valley of dead oaks.”
  • Mort – “dead” in old French.
  • Oleander – means “poisonous flower.”
  • Phobus – sounds just like phobia because it means “fear.”
  • Samael – “venom of God” in Hebrew. Wow, the Hebrew, huh!
  • Teivel – innocent sounding but is actually Yiddish for “devil.”
  • Than – “death” in Greek.
  • Tristan – “sorrowful” or “sad” in Gaelic.
  • Ubel – sounds like Uber? Yep, but it really means “evil.” Yikes!
  • Valdis – “the dead.”

Uglify A Name

ugly brown dog

You’re probably thinking that nobody knows the meaning behind the names mentioned above. You’re absolutely right. There’s a big chance that nobody will know about the menacing meaning behind the aforementioned names and think that they don’t sound bad at all. However, in case you just want to “uglify” normal names, this list is for you.

People will think they’re ordinary, but wait until they see the reaction to the spelling of these regular sounding names.

  • Abcde – pronounce it like ab-cee-dee. Enjoy the confusion.
  • Aliviyah – pronounced as Olivia but with “ghetto” spelling. There’s a long list of this so we’ll just limit ourselves to our favorites.
  • C’andre – pronounced see-Andre. Enjoy the confusion again.
  • Elizabreth – maybe your dog has lizard breath?
  • Jerrica – when you can’t decide between Jessica and Erica.
  • Kelliton – must be the diminutive form of a skeleton.
  • Melanomia – sounds like melanoma. Poor girl!
  • Meldor – is this a play on Mordor?
  • Merika/Murica – don’t do this to your country, please.
  • Mhavryc – pronounced as Maverick but with “ghetto” spelling.
  • Panthy – why would you do this to your dog?
  • Reighleigh – uglification of Riley.
  • Sassi — like Sassy but with an i. Perhaps you’re thinking it’s alright because of Toni?
  • Stiffany – an amalgamation of Stephanie and Tiffany perhaps?

The Offensive, Suspicious, Or Weird

very ugly dog

We don’t advice that you give these names to your dog. Imagine screaming any of these monikers in a crowded dog park. Chaos! Not only are they offensive and doubtful, but they’re really ugly too. Proceed with caution.

  • Anything after Ass – see above.
  • Anything after Butt – common examples include Butthead, Buttcheek, Buttface.
  • Appaloosa – but it’s a type of horse.
  • Bad words and curses – just no. This includes cuss words and bad words in different languages like Teme (bastard in Japanese), Stronzo (a**hole in Italian), or Puta (b*tch in Spanish). Remember the world is becoming multi-lingual and multi-cultural so it’s best to err on the side of caution.
  • Bomber – same as above.
  • Danger – you really want to frighten people?
  • Dog/Pooch/Animal – you’ve got no imagination.
  • Keeler — like peeler but with a K. But sounds like killer too.
  • Slang words – not a good idea—especially if it is slang for an ethnicity. This includes the dreaded N word, Chink, Abbo, Golliwog, Mammy, Paki, Hajji, Eskimo, Beaner, Cracker, Gringo, Arkey, Kanake, Injun, Chug, Hillbilly, Hun, Kraut, Dago, Yid, and the like.
  • Slang words for drugs – you don’t want to attract the FDA, but some of these are actually cute and ugly at the same time. Good examples include: Vikes (Vicodin), Perc-a-Pop (Fentanyl), Rittie (Ritalin), Meth (Methamphetamines), Adderall, Roofie (Rohypnol), MJ (marijuana), Belladonna (PCP), Salvia, and Benzo (Benzodiazepines)

Ugly Names That Are Actually Beautiful

ugly black dog

The suggestions below are listed as “ugly” by some directories but are actually beautiful with amazing meanings behind them. Check these out:

  • Agatha – Greek for “good woman.” There are also many great Agathas like Agatha Christie and St. Agatha, patron saint of firefighters and nurses.
  • Angus – not the steak. Many people think this is a poor choice of name for a dog, but it really means “the chosen one” in Gaelic. Perhaps shorten it to Gus?
  • Beauregard – sounds beautiful but is a mouthful. That’s because it has a French origin which means “beautiful gaze” or “beautiful view.” Maybe go with Beau?
  • Bertha – German for “bright and glorious.”
  • Brunhilda – Norse for “armed for battle.” Sounds brutal but also strong and brave, right?
  • Clarence – this name is probably in the “ugly” list because of the decline in its popularity due to its old-fashioned-ness. It is Latin for “bright.”
  • Donald – sadly not everybody loves Donald Duck. But maybe you will like it for your dog because it means “proud chief” in Celtic.
  • Edwina – old fashioned but not really ugly. It means “wealthy friend.”
  • Elmo – this name actually sounds cute because of Elmo in Sesame Street. It means “protector.” St. Elmo is the patron saint of sailors.
  • Gaylord – who can forget Greg from Meet the Fockers? This name means “brave.” Just don’t shorten it to “Gay” to avoid offending people.
  • Gertrude – is a German name that means “strength of a spear.” This name was very popular a century ago but dropped out during the 1900s.
  • Mortimer – how do you shorten this name? Morty? Sounds like warty. It means “dead sea.” Haunting, right?
  • Myrtle – a flower associated with youth, peace, and love. However, like Gertrude, it is an “old sounding” name and dropped in popularity during the 1940s.
  • Ursula – this name probably got a bad rep due to the villainess in Disney’s The Little Mermaid. But the name actually has a cute meaning: “little female bear.”
  • Velma – this name probably dropped in popularity and was added to the “ugly” category due to the decline in kids watching Scooby Doo. This name means “determined protector.” Very apt for a dog name.
  • Wolfgang – no name is probably more suited to give to a dog because it means “traveling wolf” in German.

Wrap Up

ugly puppy

In Shakespeare’s Romeo and Juliet, Juliet tells Romeo “a rose by any other name would smell just as sweet.» It’s the same with dogs. No matter how you call them or what name you give your pupper, they will still remain loyal, protective, and affectionate towards you. Dogs are simple creatures that only want to love and be loved so don’t be too worried about what you call them.

Still, it’s true that names are important. After all, they give you individuality that helps to distinguish yourself from other people (in this case dogs). So choose a name that is befitting your dog. While it is a personal choice so you can opt for an ugly dog name, always remember that your dog deserves dignity too.

What do you think about our name suggestions? Did you like any of them? Will you be naming your dog a name from our list? Tell us by leaving your comments below. If you think your dog needs to be prettied up a bit, check out our article on how to make dog bow ties.

About the author
Emily Young
Emily Young

Emily is originally from China where she graduated from The University of Hong Kong with high distinction learning about fashion and design. During university she opened her own magazine about Dog Fashion as dogs were always in her heart. She was surprised, when she moved to a beautiful British Columbia 10 years ago, to see many great Boutiques with dog's designer clothing and desire of pet owners to make their babies look nice.

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